As I sit here today, many thoughts are flooding my head. I have had an autoimmune flare up this weekend. I pushed too hard in an activity. I had a little too much fun with friends and drank and ate some things I shouldn’t have – for my body. I didn’t get as much rest as needed. I didn’t get done what I wanted to get done this weekend. While I don’t really regret most of what I did, because I was enjoying life, people and food, I am frustrated with what comes of it afterwards.
Not everybody’s body responds like mine does. The people I was with on my activity aren’t feeling a thing today. The bright side we had fun and they enjoyed themselves. Those I was out celebrating with are doing fine and got plenty of sleep and got their to do lists done. While this takes a toll on my mindset, I must remember that I am not everybody. I am ME. I must live the best possible life I can with what I am given. If that means scaling things back, then that is what I have to do. It doesn’t mean I am not going to do that activity anymore. Just a shorter amount of time. It doesn’t mean I am not going to drink or have chocolate again. Just a smaller amount. If something completely annihilates me, yes then I must commit to cutting that out, as I have already in certain things. However, that doesn’t leave me any less than I was yesterday. That pushes me forward to find other things that I enjoy and can partake in.
After my kundalini yoga (a new activity I would have never discovered if I hadn’t been given the blessing of my afflictions) I was sitting here wondering what I was going to post/blog about. I was a little down from feeling so flared up and I was playing with my wireless speaker to get it hooked up to my iPad so I could hear my yoga instructor better. This song starting blaring out of the speaker. Masterpiece by Jessie J. I’m honestly not even sure where it came from. I don’t have any music playing. My best guess is its picking up on one of the kids electronics upstairs.
However, it spoke to me like no other. I immediately dropped everything I was doing and just listened and affirmed who I am and what I am and why I am. I am not finished yet. I am completing my masterpiece and it will not always be pretty. I might not color inside the lines sometimes, but I’m working on it. Uphill battle, not gonna stop, I still fall on my face sometimes, perfectly incomplete – still working on my masterpiece!
Create your masterpiece. Don’t be ashamed of what you have to do to design your masterpiece. You are the masterpiece and you get to decide what makes you beautiful!
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